I think the following is a very well stated definition of what many mean when they say that they are looking for a domme who can get into their heads, or who can psychologically top them. The following takes the session from a series of mechanical activities to a head trip/mind fuck. Do you agree?
"Emotional buttons are hot spots in a submissive's psyche that can be triggered by a dominant. Pushing someone's buttons engenders within them a loss of self-control. In S/M, we push each other's buttons to open or expand our partner's sensory and sexual experience. We do this by using one type of energy: embarrassment, anxiety, fear, etc. to spark another: sexual tension.
By agreeing to be submissive to you, your partner gives you permission to channel his emotional reactions into sexuality. As his dominant, your mission is to control the flow and intensity of his emotions. You let him emote sexually as you press the buttons that keep him off balance. With his equilibrium distrubed and you controlling his environment, sensations, and movement, he starts to you for stability and security. Even though you are the one causing his distress, as long as you communicate confidence, keep him safe, and erotically stimulated, your control will increase and the session will become more intense." - Miller & Devon.
